Category Archives: Communication
July 13, 2016 9 Ways to Ask for What You Want
You’ve probably heard phrases like, “You don’t get what you don’t ask for” or “the squeaky wheel gets the grease.” There’s a reason those idioms are popular—they’re absolutely true!
It isn’t enough to secretly wish for something; the best way to get what you want is to take clear, direct action. Oftentimes, that means having the courage to call upon others for help or guidance. It means starting a dialogue and expressing your desires.
Why do we so often hesitate to ask for what we want?
This hesitation can stem from a fear of feeling vulnerable or unworthy, or the belief that successful people never ask for help. All of these fears work within us to maintain the status quo and prevent us from seeking the change we desire.
Don’t let your pride keep you from asking for what you want. This is a lesson I learned as a senior leader at 3M and one that I now apply to my current work as a career coach. It’s okay to lean on others and ask for help. You don’t have to do everything on your own!
Whether you’d like to ask for a raise, take on a new project, or revamp an outdated work system, have the courage to speak up. Seek out the areas where you desire change and begin asking the right people for help.
Harder than it sounds, right?
In order to overcome the hesitation you might feel to ask for what you want, I’ve put together these 9 guidelines:
- Be honest with yourself about your current dreams and needs—know what you want.
- Seek support from the experts and professionals around you who can best support your goals.
- Always believe that what you’re asking for is possible.
- Be genuine about your wants and honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses.
- Consider sending an email or making a phone call to introduce yourself to those who you think may be of service. Outline your needs, but don’t be pushy. Take the time to build a trusting relationship.
- Always be passionate about what you request.
- Never let fear prevent you from acting.
- Anticipate that not everyone will be able or willing to help, and always allow for a gracious opportunity for others to bow out.
- Be persistent—try, try, and try again until you achieve success.
Don’t let your inner saboteur get in the way of your own success—believe that you are deserving of what you want, and have the courage to ask for it.
MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS®DISCOVERY LICENSED PRACTITIONER, FOUNDER OF UXL, AND CO-FOUNDER OF THE TAG TEAM. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. YOU CAN VISIT HER WEBSITE AT WWW.YOUEXCELNOW.COM
Tags: ask for what you want, career advice, career ask for raise, career be direct, career coach Minneapolis, how to approach your boss, how to ask for a raise, margaret smith career coach, UXL blog, UXL career coaching
June 15, 2016 Lunch Meeting? Make the MOST of It!
When organized and executed well, the power lunch can be a perfect mixture of work, play, and hunger-quenching. To improve your power lunch performance, read the easy list of business lunch basics below.
The Basic Rules of the Business Lunch
- Place the Focus on Lunch: Consider calling it something besides a “power lunch” to avoid making your lunch partner feel like they’re about to endure another interview or staff meeting.
- Don’t Be Late: If you’re the host, show up early to double-check your reservation and make sure that your table is appropriate.
- Select the Perfect Restaurant: Choose somewhere convenient for your lunch partner and, preferably, somewhere with which you’re already familiar. Aim for a restaurant that’s not noisy or overcrowded. Inquiring about your lunch partner’s dietary preferences or limitations is also a great move.
- Don’t Jump Straight into Business: Let your lunch guest be the first to breech work subjects. This keeps things comfortable and sincere.
- Know Who Pays: Simply put, if you’ve made the reservation, you should pay. Consider leaving card information with your server ahead of time to avoid snafus or confusion.
- Show Some Respect: Show wait staff (including your hostess, server, food runner, manager, etc.) the utmost respect. How you treat these people says leagues about how you do business.
- Avoid Online Reservations: Always make and confirm your reservation over the phone or in person to ensure that your table doesn’t fall through the cracks. Make any requests concerning your seating preferences during this conversation.
Do you have questions about developing your career, business, or landing the job of your dreams? Would your career benefit from informed advice about finding more customers and building a network that gives back? Contact UXL Today to transform the future of your business or career through guided professional coaching.
MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS®DISCOVERY LICENSED PRACTITIONER, FOUNDER OF UXL, AND CO-FOUNDER OF THE TAG TEAM. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. YOU CAN VISIT HER WEBSITE AT WWW.YOUEXCELNOW.COM
Tags: career coach Margaret Smith, effective meeting, lunch meeting etiquette, lunch meeting rules, power lunch meeting, productive lunch meeting, UXL career coaching
June 8, 2016 Cheers! How to Give a Better Toast
We’ve all been there. Someone stands up or leans over the table to give a toast and it falls absolutely FLAT. Maybe there are too many inside jokes in the toast, or maybe the speaker crosses the line between funny and just plain raunchy. Or, maybe the speaker forgets their lines, fumbles their words, or loses their concentration. Or the microphone cuts out. Or the speaker mumbles. Or no one laughs at the jokes…
The list goes on and on! It makes you wonder why anyone in their right mind would agree to give a toast.
But, fear not. There are just as many ways to give a good toast as to give a horrendous one! The trick is to put a little thought into the occasion and look at it as an honor instead of a burden.
Because I’m a career and life coach, I often help people to deal with difficult or touchy situations with as much finesse, sensitivity, and effectiveness as possible. Being the “Toast-Giver” at your next special event is a perfect time to make an impression and send a message to a group.
How can you ensure that the toast you give during the summer wedding season (or any other season, for that matter) stays the impressive course and avoids turning into a train wreck? Start with these 7 handy tips:
The Toast-Giver’s Survival Guide
What’s Your Subject?
Every toast should have a subject. This should not be difficult to discern—for what reason have you all gathered today? Whether for a holiday party, wedding, graduation, or birthday, the major message of your toast should reflect the event’s specific occasion.
Practice Makes Perfect
If you’re anticipating being called on to make a speech, prepare one ahead of time and practice. Say your speech out loud (you’ll find that the pacing is much different than when you read to yourself) and practice in front of a mirror or with a friend.
Know Your Audience
Always assess the formality of the group and event. Take a cue from others who made toasts or speeches before you and, when in doubt, always keep your comments as respectful and professional as possible.
Don’t Burn the Toast!
When giving a toast, brevity is always key. Avoid causing waves of rolling eyes by sticking to your main message to avoid rambling.
Be Sober
I don’t think I need to paint a picture for you here—it’s pretty obvious what happens when someone misjudges their level of inebriation and subjects a room to their long, blush-inducing speech. If you hope to make a toast, abstain from the sauce until you’re finished.
Ditch the Inside Jokes
If only one or two people understand a reference you make during your toast, you’re alienating everyone else. If you decide to refer to a certain story or event, be sure you frame it properly so that everyone feels included.
Speak From the Heart
Avoid canned quotes or cliché phrases. Instead, be genuine, focus on the positive, and speak from the heart.
Follow these rules and make sure that your toast is remembered for the right reasons!
MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS®DISCOVERY LICENSED PRACTITIONER, FOUNDER OF UXL, AND CO-FOUNDER OF THE TAG TEAM. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. YOU CAN VISIT HER WEBSITE AT WWW.YOUEXCELNOW.COM
Tags: career coach Margaret Smith, champagne toast etiquette, embarrassing toasts, give a better toast, give a memorable toast, give the perfect toast, rules for toasting, UXL career coaching
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