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July 22, 2026 Retirement and Identity

Photo by Mantas Hesthaven on Unsplash

I have officially retired and am in the process of winding down existing projects and responsibilities. Even this blog will come to a close before the end of this year. As I move forward into true retirement (not counting my first retirement from 3M), I have been thinking about who I am as a person without an official occupation and title. Who is Margaret Smith without the career coaching, consulting, public speaking, teaching, etc.? Will my identity change? Will people see me differently?

It is said that retirement can initially feel like grieving. Part of you pines for the rhythm of the workplace, the chats with co-workers, the assignments that fill your days and keep you focused. When you lose the structure and reliability of everyday work, that can be disorienting. You’re suddenly in charge of your own schedule and filling your own days; there are no fires to put out, emails to answer, or projects to complete.

And this brings us back to the issue of identity. Without the scaffolding of work propping you up, who are you?

I’ve found that people who have not put in the time to form social networks, develop a hobby, or join a volunteer group or other collective are more disoriented after retirement. In my experience, men are usually more affected than women, since many men rely on their co-workers as a primary social network and/or group. They might go golfing with work buddies or attend work-centric parties. But these groups of people may or may not be there for you after you leave the workplace.

In my own life, I have found meaning in retirement by amplifying my volunteering, meeting up with friends, attending social groups, and more. Since my son and daughter-in-law now live down the street from me, I also help them with everyday tasks, including looking after my grandsons.

To me, identity can and should go beyond your work. What causes do you believe in? Who are you in relation to others (a friend, a spouse, a parent, a mentor, etc.)? And how do you show up in the world? Do you make an effort to lead with kindness? Do you volunteer your time or dollars, and speak up against injustices? Do you let life happen to you, or do you grab it by the horns?

These are some of the questions you could ask yourself when considering your place after retirement. Instead of grieving what you’ve lost, reframe retirement as an opportunity—a chance to reinvent yourself, become more active in your community, form deeper bonds, and try the things you’ve always wanted to try. Start taking French cooking classes, or join a stained-glass workshop, or travel to the far-flung places you’ve always wanted to see.

All that time and space without the structure of work can seem daunting at first, but I’m confident you can fill it. And there’s no rush. Take some time to reflect on how you’d like to spend your days and years and consider what will bring you fulfillment and joy. This is how you can recapture your identity in retirement.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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May 6, 2026 Stressed? You Might Need an Intentional Break

Man sitting with head in hands on a leather coach with blurred section to the left of the frame

Life can get to be a lot. We juggle work with family commitments, volunteering, household chores, and trips to the gym. We get sucked into the little dramas happening all around us, as well as the big national (and international) issues that crop up. For some, escaping means turning to their phone and scrolling (and scrolling and scrolling) through social media. But that’s not a true escape. In fact, social media can make you feel even worse than you already do.

How can you alleviate all this pressure and stress? How can you truly take a step back from life’s chaos?

I suggest taking an intentional break.

An intentional break is different than mindlessly scrolling through Instagram or watching TV. Instead, it involves purposefully stepping away from work or tasks to recharge your mind and body. It could be a short walk outside, a mindfulness meditation session, or even a brief chat with a colleague. Or it could involve something more sustained, such as a weekend getaway, vacation, or even a sabbatical.

These types of breaks of breaks are vital for your mental, emotional, and physical wellbeing. They allow you to temporarily tune out the noise, gain some perspective, and have a chance to reflect. You might discover during this downtime that something you’re currently doing (whether minor or major) is the wrong choice and it’s time to course correct. Or you might realize that you’ve been neglecting the things that are most important in your life (your health, your family, the hobbies and activities that uplift you and bring you joy).

Even if you don’t have a “grand epiphany” while engaging in your break, this time is still valuable. It can help you rejuvenate, relax, and reset your nervous system. We are not built to go, go, go without stopping, and prolonged breaks are part of the natural “pulse” of being human.

Some ideas for short-term meaningful breaks include:

  • Going on a walk or hike
  • Meditating or practicing yoga
  • Finding a quiet space to read a book
  • Nature watching (or people watching) from your window
  • Gardening (or browsing a garden center)
  • Strolling through a conservatory, zoo, or museum

Some ideas for longer-term breaks include:

  • Planning a road trip
  • Booking a stay at a cozy cabin
  • Engaging in a long-term meditation or yoga practice
  • Going on an international vacation
  • Taking a sabbatical
  • Pursuing a new hobby or re-engaging with an old one
  • Attending a silent retreat

There is no right way to take an intentional break. Do whatever fits with your circumstances and interests. And if you don’t think you have time for this type of break, keep in mind that taking the occasional break is essential for your health and can help you refocus and move forward with greater intention and energy.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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February 4, 2026 Empathy As a Superpower

Empathy is a term that is used frequently and not always in a positive manner. It is sometimes viewed as weak or wishy-washy. And some people even see it as political. In truth, empathy is not a sign of weakness but of strength. And it isn’t political, or religious, or only meant for a certain segment of the population. Rather, it is deeply human and more necessary than ever.

It’s important to note that empathy is not the same as sympathy. Sympathy relates to feeling sorry for another, or even pitying them. Empathy is more about understanding. It’s about expanding your horizons to see another’s perspective. It’s about being curious and open enough to want to understand. This innate curiosity helps people of all backgrounds and beliefs work together, live side by side, and cooperate.

Because no two people are alike, empathy can, indeed, be a superpower. It’s a way to reach others, negotiate, and have productive dialogues. When there’s a need for creativity or brainstorming solutions, it’s a way of gathering different ideas and making sense of them. That’s because empathy goes hand-in-hand with solution seeking. It is essentially the opposite of combativeness or stubbornness.

In my experience, empathetic leaders are often skilled at bringing out the best in their teams. These individuals understand the importance of truly listening—soaking in both what someone is saying and the context or subtext related to what is being said. For example, if a team member is adamant about gearing a product toward working parents, an empathetic leader might think about what they know about that team member. Maybe they are a single mother who faces numerous everyday challenges. As such, their passion makes sense, and the empathetic leader will know they are speaking from experience. Likely, this person is not the only one who is facing similar struggles, and it is probably smart to consider their perspective when developing products or solutions.

Empathy is useful in all different contexts, both within and outside of the workplace. It’s a simple fact that everyone wants to be understood and listened to. Because of this, an empathetic person makes a good conversation partner by giving others the space to express themselves and explain their perspective. That doesn’t mean being a pushover, and it doesn’t mean an empathetic person doesn’t have their own opinions and beliefs. It simply means that they are open to listening and understanding.

In a world where things are often portrayed as black and white, empathy is a courageous but necessary choice. Without it, we would constantly be at loggerheads with others, stuck in a single perspective. That’s not productive, and it only creates animosity and hard feelings. Rather, let’s make an effort to choose empathy and start really listening to what others have to say. That can make all the difference.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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