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“Creating Successful Leaders”

It’s easy to walk through life without truly seeing others. We get so caught up in our own lives, our own circles, that we often fail to see the people who are right in front of us—the cashier, the barista, the oil-change tech, the roofer, the mail carrier, the person behind the deli counter or bakery case. Whole communities of people often go unnoticed, supporting the lives of others through their work.

And then there are the people who are close to us, the co-workers we pass in the hallway, the family members with whom we share a dining table or the living room couch. We might notice these people in our daily lives, but how often do we truly see them? How well do we know them?

From my perspective, the world would be a better place if we all made an effort to see those around us in a meaningful way, to see their humanity. What if we paused to say hello and ask how someone’s day is going? And what if we truly listened to the answer, instead of rushing through the interaction? What if we stretched outside our comfort zones and dared to get to know people outside our usual circle? What if we started noticing the people who make our everyday lives possible?

Why take the time to see others?

Far too often, people fail to see the incredible network of people who support them. The hotel room is magically cleaned. The package is delivered. The bread is baked, packaged, and placed on the shelf. By acknowledging these people and systems, we can gain a greater appreciation for how much collaboration and coordination it takes to make the modern world function. You, too, are a part of this system (even as “only” a consumer/customer), and hopefully someone is appreciating your contributions!

Beyond this miracle of cooperation, learning to see others can increase our empathy, dissolve fears and prejudices, and build community. While that may sound lofty, it’s absolutely true. The more you interact with people outside of your typical network, the more you will expand your worldview. You’ll see that most people have more in common with you than you might have realized. They have families and friends, they have children and siblings, they have hobbies and special interests, they root for a particular sports team, they have dreams for the future. And you’ll probably also realize that most of us want the same things: security for our families, good food, laughter, close friends, moments of excitement and entertainment, a comfortable bed.

In short, seeing the humanity in others can help us be better neighbors and citizens. If we dare to lift our eyes to truly see the people in front of us, we can open ourselves to new worlds and perspectives. If more people made an intentional effort to see others, can you imagine how that might change the world for the better?

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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In my last blog post, I discussed Legacy (with a capital “L”), focusing on the overarching impact a person might leave behind. This week, I’m drilling down a bit and addressing the concept of “everyday legacy,” the effects a person can have on those around them on a daily basis.

There’s a famous saying (often attributed to Lao Tzu) that goes: “Watch your thoughts, they become words. Watch your words, they become actions. Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your habits, they become character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.” This is the main idea behind an everyday legacy. Your daily thoughts, words, and actions matter.

Although they may not seem to make much of a difference in the moment, what you do and how you behave can form who you are and how you’re perceived. A passing conversation, a comment in a meeting, a kind gesture, or even your body language can speak volumes about your genuine persona. You never know what kind of impact you’re making on someone—the impression you’re leaving during a discussion or interaction.

In short, it all matters. That may seem daunting, but it can also be viewed as an opportunity. You have the opportunity to put your best foot forward at all times and in all situations. Recognizing this can help guide you through everyday situations.

Will you respond with an insult/snarky comment or with understanding and kindness?

Will you choose to engage in gossip or push back?

Will you recognize others achievements or gloss over them?

Will you include someone in the conversation or ignore them?

All these choices make a difference, and they add up over time. Even though it might seem like a small thing to send someone a thank you card or commend someone’s work during a meeting, these types of gestures are often remembered. And they all accumulate to make up your core personality—who you are and how you’re perceived.

The main thing to keep in mind is that you have a choice when it comes to everyday legacy. If you want to be known as a fair and caring leader, you can choose to behave in a way that reflects that persona. If you want others to see you as a sharp contributor, show up as that person as often as you can. Lean into your best self—the self you want others to know and recognize.

Your everyday legacy can be shaped by YOU. How will you demonstrate it today through words and actions?

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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Photo by Joshua Earle on Unsplash

In my retirement years, I’ve been thinking a lot about legacy. What are the things a person leaves behind as they walk through life? How will people remember you? What influences will you pass along to family, friends, and co-workers?

To me, there are two types of legacies:

  1. The capital-L Legacy is the overarching legacy, the way you’ll be remembered after you pass on.
  2. The lowercase-l legacy is the briefer, shorter-term one, the impact you have on those around you on a daily basis.

Both types of legacies are important, and this week I will be focusing on the capital-L Legacy, the one that deals with your long-term impact. (My next post will address “everyday legacy,” so stay tuned!)

Everyone makes their mark on history, whether in a soft, subtle way or in a visible, major way. In reality, most of us will have a smaller ripple than the big names in history, but that’s okay! Even if you can positively impact five or ten people, that’s a Legacy worth leaving.

Keep in mind, your Legacy goes beyond money or finances (although philanthropy, charitable giving, and estate planning could be part of it). Your Legacy might be tied to your volunteer work, or your generous and loving spirit, or the way you prioritize your family. It might be rooted in your dedication to your career and all the people you supported and mentored along the way. Or it could be tied to your faith and your involvement in your worship community.

Legacy could also be tied to the things you created—photographs you took, woodworking projects you created, paintings you made, or essays you wrote. For years, I’ve worked with Kate Leibfried, founder of Click Clack Writing, and she often focuses on this type of work (ghostwriting memoirs and business books for her clients). Recently, she spoke about this type of Legacy in a webinar for Everbright Legacy Law. One of her main messages was that words (particularly those that come from the heart and are not AI generated) have staying power. If you want to tell your true, authentic story, what’s stopping you? Everyone has a story to tell, and it could be worth writing it down.

Keep in mind, big-picture Legacies do not happen overnight. They are the result of years of living authentically, planning, giving, and being involved. As a thought exercise, consider this: What would people write in your memorial or obit today? If you are unsure or if you don’t think they would write what you’d want to hear, consider how you might change that. If you want to be known for your generosity, start planning how to amplify your giving. If you want to leave a Legacy of good works/volunteerism, figure out how to do that. If you’d like to leave behind your physical creations, start making more art!

Just make sure you’re doing what feels authentically and wholly you. A Legacy doesn’t have to be flashy or loud. It should simply reflect who you are at your core.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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