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Tag Archives: Margaret Smith UXL

It’s easy to say yes. We naturally aim to please our co-workers and supervisors; we want to look good in the eyes of the company and get that raise or earn that promotion. But saying yes can be dangerous. If you say yes to everything—every assignment, every request, every invitation—you’ll end up stretching yourself too thin and you’ll possibly end up taking on work that isn’t in your sweet spot or doing things that go against your code of ethics.

Though I’m a proponent of trying new things and being agreeable, there are times when it is in your best interest to give a firm N-O. Here are three scenarios where saying “No” is the best course of action (accompanied by three strategies to pull it off):

1. You have too much on your plate.

If you feel your workload growing out of control and can tell the quality of your work is sharply declining, it’s time to say no. How to do it? The next time your project leader tries to assign you something new, do not immediately say yes. Arrange to meet one-on-one (it is much easier to reason with someone one-on-one than in a group) and lay out your reasons for not wanting to take on the project.

Be prepared. Make a spreadsheet that clearly displays the projects you are currently tackling and how much time you spend each day on each project. Also, come into the meeting with a counter-proposal in mind. If you know of someone else who might have the capacity (and desire) to take on the project, suggest that person to your project leader (be sure to get that individual’s approval ahead of time).

Alternatively, you could suggest a future date that would work for you to start the project (i.e. “I’m busy from now until the end of the May, but I could start working on this project in June.”)

2. You are being given work that is not in your “sweet spot.”

This is a tough one, but ultimately, if you are constantly handed work that does not align with your areas of expertise, you are doing both your company and yourself a disservice. Your company won’t receive the best possible work and you’ll be straying from your career goals.

So, how to say no? Again, a one-on-one meeting with your supervisor is helpful in this situation. Explain to her what your ultimate goals are and what kind of projects you prefer. One of the best things you can do in this situation is approach it with confidence and decisiveness. Know where you’d like to be heading and explain, confidently, how you’d like to get there.

Ultimately, if your company is not supportive of your career goals (or if you find that the type of work you do consistently does not align with your sweet spot), it is time to start searching for something new, either inside or outside your current company.

3. Saying yes compromises your values.

There are times when it just does not feel good to say yes. Perhaps you agree to attend a late-night strategy session, knowing that your daughter has a piano recital that night. Or perhaps a co-worker dumps several assignments on your lap that are really her responsibility, not yours. Or maybe you’ve had to sacrifice your health or nightly down-time because of all the projects you’ve agreed to do. Whatever the case, sometimes saying yes is simply not the right decision.

How to say no? First of all, know your priorities. Does your family come first? Your health? Your mental wellbeing? When one of the things that’s important in your life becomes compromised, it’s time to say no. Keep an open line of communication with your boss and let him know when you feel like work is tipping the scales of your work-life balance.

And another thing: think before you say yes. Always take a moment to pause, assess the situation, and make a deliberate decision. If that means waiting a day or two to mull over the pros and cons, so be it. Ultimately, you need to feel good about agreeing to do something before you say “yes.”

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

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I am a big proponent of heart-led leadership. So many leadership courses, books, and webinars teach us that leaders have to be firm, competent, excellent communicators, and assertive. While those traits can be helpful in leadership, I would put a different trait above them: compassion.

When people think about compassion and kindness in leadership, they may think that means the leader is soft or a “pushover.” In my experience, however, kindness does not automatically mean weakness. It is very possible to be both kind and assertive. It is possible to genuinely care about your people and create firm boundaries and expectations.

Instead of a weakness, I see kindness as a superpower. When you take the time to truly get to know your people, listen to them, and offer genuine compassion and respect, you foster a positive work environment where people want to show up and do good work. When people feel that they are part of a caring team, they will want to put their best foot forward, meet deadlines, and perform at their peak. They’re motivated to do better, because they know the company’s leadership has a vested interest in them and their success.

To establish yourself as a kind, caring leader, you can begin by taking a few action steps that convey your heart-led leadership style. Here are 6 suggestions:

Schedule One-on-Ones

Even busy leaders can find fifteen or twenty minutes to meet one-on-one with a team member. Taking the time to check in with someone individually will not only convey that you care, but will also provide some valuable time for you to get to know the person across the table on a personal level. This can be difficult to achieve in group settings, especially if the person is not terribly open or outspoken.

Get to Know Your People

When engaging in one-on-ones, it’s a good idea to ask a few “get to know you” questions. Start learning about your team members’ backgrounds, families, pets, and interests, and be sure to touch on these things in subsequent meetings (“How is your mom? Is she feeling any better since her accident?”). If you need help remembering details about others, try creating a spreadsheet dedicated to tracking information about each team member—the name of their kids, the type of dog they have, etc. Few people have a perfect memory, and there’s no shame in using a tool to help yourself out.

Open Up

When you’re getting to know others, it is important to reciprocate. Any relationship, including work relationships, are healthiest when they are a two-way street. Offer information about yourself when it seems relevant and appropriate. For example, if your team member is talking about an upcoming vacation, you might tell them a little about your experience visiting that area, or you could talk about your own upcoming trip.

Ask Good Questions (and Listen!)

Asking good questions is an art. When sitting down with someone, it’s important to not just talk at them or ask yes/no questions. Instead, ask open-ended questions that prompt a dialogue. These types of questions can help you get to know the other person and will help you gauge the temperature of the workplace (Are tempers hot? Has enthusiasm for a project or client cooled?).

But asking questions isn’t enough. It is also critical to listen to the answers and attempt to understand the other person’s perspective. If you’re unsure about what someone is saying, or you need more details, be sure to ask follow-up questions. Alternatively, you could repeat back what you think you heard by saying, “It sounds like you’re saying XYZ, is that correct?”

Show Genuine Appreciation

Pay attention to your people and show them appreciation whenever they go above and beyond. Call out outstanding performance, recognize achievements, or write out a thank you card. These small acts can make an enormous difference.

Take Action to Improve the Workplace

When sitting down with your people, you might discover that they are unhappy with certain aspects of the workplace. If that’s the case, it is imperative to take steps to create change. You don’t want to be the type of person who is all talk and no action. Rather, if you are genuinely committed to being a positive presence, that means taking meaningful action to improve the workplace and the lives of the people who work for you.

Kindness and compassion are not incompatible with strong leadership. Rather, it can help improve morality, foster a better work environment, and create an energized atmosphere in the office. How might the modern workplace transform if all leaders chose to be kind?

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

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Nearly four years after the start of the 2020 COVID pandemic, the workplace seems to be permanently changed. Although some companies have required its people to return to work full-time, many have continued to allow working from home (WFH) at least a few days each week.

And why not? For many people, this way of working is advantageous. People may have an easier time concentrating at home (less background chatter and people popping in and out of your cubicle), they might feel more at ease, and they often have more control over their time. Working from home can be especially helpful for parents or caretakers, who regularly have to rush around at odd hours of the day. What’s more, a study by Owl Labs shows that, “On average, those who work from home spend 10 minutes less a day being unproductive, work one more day a week, and are 47% more productive.”

However, WFH comes with its own set of challenges. A work team might be less unified or less comfortable with each other than if they were working together in person. Leaders might feel that they have less control over their people, or they may have trouble understanding precisely what their team is working on. Additionally, morale can be difficult for leaders to gauge when their team is working remotely.

How can company leaders face these challenges head on? Here are a few tips and best practices:

Encourage communication

Foster open and frequent communication channels within the remote team. Use video conferences, instant messaging, and project management tools to ensure everyone is on the same page. While communication is vital, it is also important to make sure you’re not micromanaging or imposing on others’ boundaries (such as expecting an email reply after normal work hours). Communicate clearly and regularly, but be respectful.

Set clear expectations

Clearly define goals, deadlines, and deliverables for the team. Provide detailed instructions and guidelines to minimize confusion and ensure productivity. Create a shared understanding of what success looks like for each project or task. This will help team members stay focused and aligned with the overall objectives. Be transparent about priorities and any changes that may arise. Regularly check in with team members to provide feedback and address any concerns or roadblocks.

Promote collaboration

Encourage collaboration among team members, even when they are not physically together. Create opportunities for brainstorming, problem-solving, and sharing ideas. Foster a sense of belonging and teamwork by organizing virtual team-building activities or social events. Collaboration tools such as shared documents or virtual whiteboards can facilitate this process.

Check in regularly

Regular check-ins can ensure employee well-being and address any issues they may be facing. This can be done through one-on-one meetings or team check-ins. Show genuine care and interest in the work and personal lives of your people, and offer support and resources to help them navigate any challenges they may encounter while working remotely.

Provide necessary resources

Ensure that your remote team has the necessary resources to effectively work from home. This includes access to reliable internet connection, appropriate software and tools, and any additional equipment they might need. Provide training and support to help your team members maximize their productivity and adapt to remote work. Stay updated on the latest technology and tools that can enhance remote collaboration and efficiency.

Establish a supportive culture

Foster a positive and inclusive remote work culture by promoting empathy, trust, and work-life balance. It is possible to encourage team members to support and uplift each other, even from a distance. As a leader, you can recognize and celebrate their achievements and milestones, offer flexibility, encourage self-care and stress management, and create opportunities for team members to connect on a personal level, such as virtual coffee breaks or team lunches. And don’t forget to lead by example, demonstrating a healthy work-life balance and prioritizing well-being.

Managing remote teams requires leaders to adapt to the unique challenges and opportunities that come with remote work. With a little effort and a smart strategy in place, leaders can effectively lead remote teams and ensure their success. The modern landscape has permanently changed; how will YOU adapt?


MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

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