October 3, 2018 How To Rebuild Trust at Work
So you’ve made a mistake and your relationships are suffering because of it. You may have dropped the ball on an important project, gotten caught in a lie, or failed to follow through when people were counting on you. The possibilities are endless, but the result is the same: your employer, employees, or clients are having a hard time trusting you because of what happened.
Even if you have already apologized endlessly and amended the mistake you made, you may still be feeling reverberations from the incident. You’re facing the unfortunate truth that so many have had to learn the hard way: trust is much more quickly lost than it is built.
How do you begin the process of rebuilding trust? Start with these three steps, and remember to be patient with yourself—trust-building takes time, energy, and a concerted effort.
1. In work, as in life, the first thing to do is own up to what you’ve done. Apologize to the people who were hurt, using language that makes it clear you know where the blame lies. Don’t just say you’re sorry it happened—say you’re sorry for what you, personally, did or did not do.
Accept the blame if it belongs to you. Sloughing it off to the person next to you does not signal that you are actually sorry. Listen to the other party’s grievances and acknowledge their validity without becoming defensive. Make it verbally clear that you not only regret what happened, but you are ready to take action to repair your relationship.
2. Once you’ve made a clear and sincere apology, it’s time to take tangible steps. Be conscious about making commitments and sticking to them. If you say you’ll be somewhere or do something, follow through. The goal is to have people associate you with punctuality and dependability. Turn projects in on time. Follow up on the little things you say you’ll “talk about later.” Give people your full attention when you’re having a conversation. Keep the right things confidential. In short, be present.
3. If you have taken these steps, you have fixed your mistake and proven you are still dependable. In order to actively build a positive impression, look for ways to go above and beyond expectations. Take time to catalogue common goals you have with the person or group you need to rebuild trust with. Think of ways you can demonstrate that these goals are your priority. Go the extra mile on projects—anticipate needs and resolve problems quickly.
Psychologist Paul White says that trust is built on competence, character, and consistency. The truth is that trust takes time to rebuild, but if you intentionally consider the ways you went wrong and what it will take to reconstruct a relationship, you will certainly be in a better place than if you ignore the issue. Let the work you put into your relationships become the new point that defines your personal and professional character.
MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS®DISCOVERY LICENSED PRACTITIONER, FOUNDER OF UXL, AND CO-FOUNDER OF THE TAG TEAM. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. YOU CAN VISIT HER WEBSITE AT WWW.YOUEXCELNOW.COM
Tags: earn coworkers trust, Margaret Smith life coach, Margaret Smith Minneapolis career coach, rebuild trust at work, regain trust, trusting workplace
September 26, 2018 Find Your Voice and OWN It
Your thoughts matter.
Do you believe that simple sentence? Have you internalized your worth as both a human being and a key component of your workplace?
I’ll say it again: Your thoughts matter.
Far too often, people feel like their ideas, opinions, or points of view do not mean as much as others’. They feel minimized or silenced. They feel some kind of invisible barrier, holding them back from speaking up.
Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever been at a meeting and decided against speaking up or voicing your opinion? Have you ever felt shut out of a conversation, even though you had something to contribute? Why?
Unfortunately, a few dominant voices tend to rule the workplace. Whether they became the “big players” through experience or by aggressively asserting their point of view, these are the people who do not easily share the floor with others.
So, how do you break in? How do you find your professional voice and speak it?
Start small. Try a few of the following steps and keep building your confidence–and your voice–through intentional actions.
- Practice speaking your mind in one-on-one meetings or informal lunch gatherings.
- Build your confidence before you go into a meeting. Try using Amy Cuddy’s power pose or repeating affirmations.
- Set a concrete goal (i.e. I will speak up at least twice during our next meeting).
- Have a candid discussion with those who shut you out of meetings (they may not even realize they’re doing it!). Don’t be confrontational, be conversational. Present your case by using the D4 feedback model.
- Involve others. If you notice someone else itching to say something, be an advocate for them. Say something like, “It looks like Susan has something to say.” Your gesture won’t go unnoticed and (hopefully) the favor will be returned at some point
- Be prepared and know your stuff! Do your research before walking into a meeting and come prepared to ask at least three good questions (I’m a huge proponent of asking good questions!).
- Keep it up. Even when you’re not feeling especially assertive, keep up your confidence through affirmations, intentional breaks (get away from your desk!), and by practicing good all-around self-care.
Your voice is valuable! It’s time others heard it.
MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS®DISCOVERY LICENSED PRACTITIONER, FOUNDER OF UXL, AND CO-FOUNDER OF THE TAG TEAM. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. YOU CAN VISIT HER WEBSITE AT WWW.YOUEXCELNOW.COM
Tags: build confidence, business coach Margaret Smith, find and own voice, find voice work, margaret smith career coach, women confidence workplace, women speak out work, women strong voice
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- Posted under Advice from a Life Coach, Communication, Thrive at Work
September 19, 2018 Success is No Accident [Video]
Carrie Green is a successful entrepreneur and founder of Female Entrepreneur Association. In her Ted Talk, she discusses reprogramming your brain for success. Many of us have limiting thoughts (I can’t, there are too many obstacles, etc.) that hold us back from achieving greatness. Carries argues that anyone can overcome these limiting thoughts by having a strong vision and believing, wholeheartedly, that that vision will come true.
In short, success is no accident. It starts by :
1)Knowing exactly what you want to achieve
2)Knowing why you need to achieve it
3)Knowing the kind of a person that you need to become to achieve it
4) Programming your mind to achieve it (Visualization, Affirmation)
For the full talk, click on the video below. Begin at 10:20 or so for the meat of the lecture.
MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS®DISCOVERY LICENSED PRACTITIONER, FOUNDER OF UXL, AND CO-FOUNDER OF THE TAG TEAM. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. YOU CAN VISIT HER WEBSITE AT WWW.YOUEXCELNOW.COM
Tags: achieve goals, career coach Margaret Smith, courageous goals, goal setting, Margaret Smith life coach, success is not an accident, Ted Talk Carrie Green, visualize success
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- Posted under Changing Your Life, Goals
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