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“Creating Successful Leaders”

Tag Archives: Tips for Motivation People

March 23, 2013 Dealing Out Direct Criticism: Often Unpleasant, Always Important

Here in Minnesota especially, we go out of our way to avoid unpleasant confrontation. In fact, many Minnesotans go to extravagant, almost comical lengths to avoid having to engage another person when doing so might bring out anger, hurt feelings or raised voices.

In many ways, this tendency isn’t bad. Minnesotans are very in tune with other people’s feelings, and are thus extremely empathetic and understanding. They want to keep everyone’s self-esteem in tact, and would much prefer to build people up than knock them down.

This behavior gets to be a problem, however, when giving criticism is necessary. Simply put, we all mess up, and we all need to be confronted at times when our faults get in the way of other people’s ability to lead successful lives.

Of course, I’m speaking in pretty general terms. Not all Minnesotans are non-confrontational or passive aggressive. But it is a stereotype that contains some truth, which is why I’d like to talk about it today.

An article in The Harvard Business Review points to the consequences of being overly casual in criticism: “A too-polite veneer often signals an overly politicized workplace: Colleagues who are afraid to speak honestly to people’s faces do it behind their backs. This behavior exacts a price.”

In other words, criticism will find its way into the workplace somehow. It is better to deal with it openly and honestly than to allow it to fester in the form of gossip and passive-aggression.

The biggest problem I see with people both giving and receiving criticism is their failure to separate their performance with their whole being. A comforting fact to remember is that when you must criticize (and to be a good leader, you must) you are never tearing down a person’s inner self. On the contrary, good criticism is meant as a way to strengthen the individual.

The best criticism is direct. It is not sandwiched between compliments. It does not rely upon outside explanation. It never comes from an emotional area; it is fact-based.

We all have trouble doing this well. To work on your direct criticism skills, consider the following tips.

1. Use Active Sentences. “You need to work on meeting your deadlines.” “I am counting on you to improve your attitude in regards to dealing with our customers.”

Not “If the invoices could be completed a bit sooner, that would be great.” This criticism is shrouded in vagueness regarding who should complete the invoices, how much sooner, and why this is necessary.

2. Be Specific. Provide facts and reasons for your criticism. Connect the specific areas that you feel need improvement with the bigger picture.

3. Don’t feel the need to feel bad or apologize. Giving criticism calmly and confidently shows the individual that for one thing, it is not a personal attack, and for another, that you are assured in the necessity of providing this criticism. You are doing this because you want the person to succeed.

Making this a habit opens the door to real, honest communication between members of an organization. This in turn makes the environment better-suited for productivity, clarity and trust.

Ferrazzi, Keith. “Candor, Criticism, Teamwork.” Harvard Business Review, January-February 2012. Accessed March 23, 2013. http://hbr.org/2012/01/candor-criticism-teamwork/ar/1

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March 13, 2013 Is Competition In Business Always A Good Thing?

We’ve constantly been told that to succeed, you must compete early, often and without fail. Good leaders stoke a competitive drive in their employees, the common knowledge says. Competition leads to innovation, innovation leads to breakthroughs and advancements in the industry as a whole, and this leads to a greater flourish in the economy. Or so the thinking goes.

I believe that some competition is good, but is there such a thing as too much competition, or negative competition?

When I was a member of the corporate world, I vividly remember feeling the need to compete with my coworkers–to be the first to get my project done, to be the most consistent, most creative member of the team, always looking up the ladder for opportunities of personal promotion. This was a very real atmosphere in many of the places I worked, and while it did prompt us to work harder and look for ways to innovate, it also created an environment of distrust, bitterness and at times, outright hostility between employees.

This is the downside of competition. I believe that internal competition actually creates stress and robs valuable energy that would otherwise be spent on the creation of remarkable business strategies. Healthy teams, after all, are built on unity and clarity of vision, trust, and mutual respect. They are NOT built on an environment of selfishness and back stabbing.

As a leader, it’s vital that you are aware of the culture of your business and make a point to reward teamwork and support. Address issues of negative competition early on, and be clear that the “make way for number one” attitude doesn’t help the organization as a whole, it hurts it.

When in doubt, use this rubric for determining between good and bad competition: healthy competition motivates and pushes the organization forward, while unhealthy competition poisons the workplace atmosphere, which in turn hinders growth.

In the big picture, unity and trust are your biggest allies for true innovation and success.

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March 6, 2013 Speak Up! The Growing Need for Great Public Speakers

From a leadership standpoint, the ability to speak before people–and do it well–is one of the most invaluable skills you can possess.

Yet most of us have trouble getting up in front of a crowd, which is completely normal. I was terrified when I first began giving talks, and I’m sure my early talks had a lot of room for improvement. But now, because I speak so often, speaking before a group doesn’t bother me at all. I’ve been tweaking my skills for the past few years, and one of the most rewarding feelings is knowing that I’ve effectively captivated an audience.

Toastmasters is a world-wide organization that trains people in public speaking. They offer a few tips that help beat the initial fear we get right before it’s time to step up in front of a crowd.

1. Know Your Material. They suggest that you speak on things you’re truly interested in, and know more about it than you include in your speech.

2. Practice. And practice out loud, at the volume you plan on speaking, and repeat the speech over and over, until you’ve memorized it entirely.

3. Relax. Monitor your breathing and any tension you might be harboring in your shoulders. Keep your breathing steady and slow, and try to keep your muscles loose.

4. Don’t apologize for any mistake you make during your speech. The audience probably didn’t notice it.

5. The audience is on your side. It’s easy to slip into the thinking that the audience is hostile to anything you have to say, which is absurd. They wouldn’t be sitting there if they weren’t interested. They want you to succeed.

Being comfortable in front of a group lets you most aptly convey your personal brand to many people at once. In person, you can show your true personality, your speaking style, and the things that really make you excited. Doing this well takes practice, but it is one of the better ways of promoting your ideas.

Give it a try!

Reference

http://www.toastmasters.org/tips.asp

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