UXL Blog

Throughout the years on this blog, I have often talked about heart-led leadership. This type of leadership is rooted in empathy and genuine care for others. It is not weak and does not involve being a pushover. Rather, it centers around building others up, engaging and empowering your team, and creating positive motion and change. This week, I want to address one specific aspect of heart-led leadership: checking in.

Far too often, we dive straight into business without taking the time to ask how the other person or people are doing. And I’m not talking about surface-level pleasantries that typically go, “How are you?” “Fine.” I’m talking about creating the space to let people be a little honest and vulnerable if they choose. No one should feel obligated to share anything they don’t want to share, but all people should feel invited to share it they’d like.

How might this look in practice? If you’re leading a meeting, you could take a few minutes at the beginning to let people open up. If something big has happened at work or in the local community (either good or bad), you could also acknowledge that. For example: “I know it’s been a tough week for everyone since we lost Client ABC, so I wanted to check in to see how everyone’s feeling and if you have any brief thoughts related to that.”

Another example: “I know the city has been chaotic lately with recent events, so I want to check in to gauge everyone’s headspace and see if I can offer extra support in some way.”

Keep in mind, this approach may not be appropriate for all groups at all times. You probably wouldn’t have this type of check-in with teams you barely know or when you only have a quick meeting scheduled. Use your judgement.

Alternatively, it can often be best to check in with others individually. In fact, you should probably do this anyway, regardless of whether you decide to check in with an entire group. An individual check-in is more personal, and if the other person really feels the need to open up about something, they can do so in private. But you have to build trust first! Demonstrate that you are respectful, a good listener, discrete with sensitive information, and that you genuinely care.

Checking in with team members helps create a safe and supportive space where people are free to be, well…people. Imperfect, stressed, frustrated, sad—we all feel these types of emotions sometimes, and it’s nearly impossible to stop their effects from trickling into the workplace. So why attempt to stop them? It’s better to get an idea of what the people in your office are going through and feeling so you can offer whatever resources, support, or allowances they need.

In short: a human workplace is a welcoming workplace.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE.

Tags: checking in meaningful, checking in with work team, Margaret Smith business coach, margaret smith career coach, meaningful check in at work, why check in work team