Skip to content

UXL Blog

“Creating Successful Leaders”

Tag Archives: Margaret Smith life coach

February 16, 2022 5 ways to soothe your tired mind

Recently, mental health has been in the spotlight, and for good reason! People are struggling more than ever in this era of uncertainty and apprehension. In fact, the CDC found in a survey that two in five adults have symptoms of depression or anxiety. That’s staggering! And, unfortunately, there isn’t much help for those dealing with mental health issues, partially due to the enduring stigma around mental health.

But here’s the truth of the matter: mental health is health, and it does matter. Research shows that there is a strong link between physical and mental health, and poor mental health has been connected to ailments such as cardiovascular issues, obesity, or even cancer.

Even if you’re not experiencing depression or anxiety, you might not quite be thriving. If you’re feeling drained, aimless, or less-than-joyful, you could be experiencing what researcher and science author Adam Grant calls languishing.

According to Grant, “Languishing is a sense of stagnation and emptiness. It feels as if you’re muddling through your days, looking at your life through a foggy windshield.” He goes on to say, “[Languishing] is the void between depression and flourishing — the absence of well-being.” 

I suspect many of us are feeling this state of “languishing” more than ever. If you’re working from home, you might be feeling the monotony of staying in the same space, day after day, and interacting with the same people. You might feel like you’re stuck in “survival mode” and your creative spark isn’t what it used to be.

How can you stave off languishment and rediscover your joy? While I don’t have a magic bullet, I do have a few suggestions:

Step Away

A change of scenery can do wonders for your wellbeing. Stepping away from your desk or your house can give you a fresh perspective and a little distance from any problems you might be facing. Take a walk outside, move your laptop to a coffee shop or library, go out for lunch, practice yoga or hop on the treadmill—whatever appeals most to you! Stepping away, counting, and focusing on your breathing can also create a sense of calm and help put things in perspective.

Focus on One Task

If you’re feeling spread thin or anxious, try focusing on only one task at a time. Don’t give in to the pressure to multitask! Close your email, put your phone on airplane mode, and commit to working on just one thing. This focus time can ease your nerves and give you a sense of accomplishment.

Even if your focus time only lasts half an hour or an hour, that can be enough time to make good progress. Try the “one task at a time” technique whenever you’re feeling scattered or exhausted.

Try for Small Wins

If you are floundering or feeling worn out, try to accomplish one “small win.” This could be any minor, easily accomplished task. For example, test all your pens and toss the ones that no longer work. Or, send one important email you’ve been putting off. Or, clean up your computer desktop or downloads folder. These mini tasks can give you the forward momentum you need to tackle larger projects.

Respect Your “Temple”

Your body is a temple. It’s true. If we don’t treat our physical selves well, our mental and emotional sides also suffer. Take time every day to treat yourself well. Instead of opting for a quick Pop-tart or donut for breakfast, make yourself some eggs with spinach or a bowl of oatmeal with berries and chia seeds. Other ways to “respect your temple” include exercising regularly, de-stressing (taking a hot bath, enjoying a cup of tea, reading a book, getting a professional massage), and setting aside some quiet time for reflection or meditation.

Practicing self-care is essential for maintaining your energy and spark for life. If you don’t take the time to be kind to yourself, how will you have the capacity to care for others or perform at your best?

Talk to Someone

Do not underestimate the power of human connection. If you’re feeling stressed, sullen, or aimless, don’t be afraid to reach out to a close friend or family member for help. Sometimes, simply talking over your issues (or venting!) is exactly what you need to work things out or put things in perspective. If you’ve been feeling truly awful lately, it’s a good idea to schedule a couple sessions with a therapist or psychiatrist. Your mental health is worth it.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

Tags: , , , , , ,

January 26, 2022 7 Ways to Rejuvenate WITHOUT Taking a Vacation

You’re worn thin. You’ve been busy juggling several different work projects with family life and other commitments. You haven’t taken quality time for yourself in ages. In short…you’re EXHAUSTED. What to do? How can you rest, rejuvenate, and forge ahead?

In past blog posts, I’ve talked about the merits of taking a break (a long break, if possible!), but not everyone has the luxury of being able to pack up and go on vacation whenever they’re feeling worn out. If that’s you, you might try taking some “mini breaks.” These brief moments away can help renew your energy and fortify you so you can face the stressors of work, relationships, or simply everyday life.

Keep in mind: when you take these mini breaks, it’s best to do so completely. Turn your phone to airplane mode, schedule “you time” on the calendar, and step away as much as possible. Otherwise, you’ll never fully relax…and that pretty much defeats the purpose!

Here are 7 ideas for ways to rejuvenate without taking a full-on vacation:

1. Set aside a “favorite things” day

What do you enjoy doing more than anything? Do you like to read? Watch movies? Wander through gardens, conservatories, or the woods? Visit museums? Enjoy good food and/or good company?

Pick some of your favorite things and plan a day around them! This mini vacation is all about YOU. Grab brunch in the morning, catch up on your reading list, go to a basketball game or a movie–whatever makes you happy.

Don’t forget to plan ahead! If you have responsibilities (young kids, work commitments, etc.) make sure they are taken care of so you don’t have to divide your attention during your “favorite things” day.

2. Designate a “slow cooking” night

If you enjoy cooking, make an effort to set aside one night each week to fully immerse yourself in “slow cooking.” Instead of rushing to put dinner on the table, luxuriate in planning a menu, prepping your dishes, cooking, and enjoying the fruits of your labors. If you don’t love cooking, have a nice night out instead. In many cultures outside the US, food is savored and enjoyed, rather than rushed through. Rediscover the pleasure in eating a nice meal.

3. Try an unplugged workout

When you go to the gym or take a walk outside, are you tempted to check your phone and reply to emails? Do you constantly see notifications coming in?

These little distractions take away from what could be very healthy, and potentially relaxing, activities. Instead of letting your phone derail your active time, turn it to airplane mode and listen to music or an audiobook you’ve downloaded. If you need to keep limited notifications on, try your phone’s “Do Not Disturb” function and only let priority phone numbers get through. That way, when you work out you can truly immerse yourself in the activity.

4. Have an art night

Do you enjoy photography? Painting? Woodworking? If you have an artistic hobby that you haven’t indulged in a while, set aside some time for it! You might even decide to have a weekly art night, dedicated to your hobby.

5. Take a spa day

There’s nothing quite like a spa day when it comes to self-care. Indulge yourself with a massage, haircut, facial, or whatever you need to help you feel more relaxed and rejuvenated. If you’re on a budget, make it a DIY spa day with an at-home facial, a bath with Epsom salts, scented candles, etc. On the other hand, if you’re able to spend some extra cash, consider going to an all-inclusive spa where you can relax and spend the night (there’s something to be said about being away from your own home and the mounds of responsibilities that await you there!).

6. Catch up on your reading list

Do you have a mountain of to-read books you’ve been meaning to get to? Take a long afternoon to enjoy a hot beverage or a glass of wine, and curl up with a good book. Take a “book afternoon” whenever you need to–whenever you’re feeling tired and need a cozy getaway.

7. Have a slow morning

Whenever you need it, set aside a day to have a late morning. Block off time on your calendar (just as you would if you had a doctor or dentist appointment), and clock into work around noon. Use your slow morning to sleep in, practice yoga or meditate, read a newspaper or book over a cup of coffee, or perhaps grab brunch at your favorite breakfast joint. It’s amazing what a relaxed morning can do for productivity!

If you find yourself feeling burnt out, but can’t spring for a real vacation, try some of these mini breaks! Spending intentional time relaxing and unwinding can work wonders for your energy and productivity.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

Tags: , , , , , ,

January 19, 2022 How Bad Could It Be? (Combat worrywart tendencies)

Are you a worrier? Do you tend to dwell on something and envision the worst possible outcomes? There is something to be said for preparing for the worst; however, constant worrying and catastrophizing can also lead to anxiousness, constant fear, and difficulty finding enjoyment or joy.

How can you combat your worrywart tendencies?

Psychiatrist Katherine Pannel recommends a thought exercise. If you’re faced with an uncertain situation, picture the very worst outcome, then shift your thinking and imagine the very best outcome. After that, consider the most likely outcome, which will probably land somewhere in the middle of the two scenarios. This exercise helps you to refocus and “redirect your thoughts to a more realistic, comfortable place.”

Another way to stop worrying so much is to focus on preparations.

When you know you’ve put in the leg work and are thoroughly prepared, there’s less cause for worry. Tell yourself that you’ve done everything you can, and the outcome will be what it will be.

When I’m preparing for a presentation or an important meeting, I try to allow myself time to A) prepare the material B) practice and C) anticipate possible questions. Ideally, when you practice it should be out loud, in front of a mirror or with a friend or family member. When you’re anticipating possible questions, think about the things people are likely to ask AND anticipate any follow-up questions to those initial questions. When you’re prepared, you tend to feel more confident and less worried. You’ve done what you can, and the rest is out of your hands.

Lastly, if you’d like to stop worrying so much it’s important to accept your imperfections.

Recognize that you are not perfect, and you don’t have to be. Nobody is! If you make a mistake, it’s okay (truly). Pick yourself, attend to any necessary damage control, and try again. Many of us have unrealistic expectations for ourselves (we would probably never treat others the way we sometimes treat ourselves!), and that isn’t healthy. Instead, be kind to yourself, recognize you’re an imperfect human being, and simply try your best.

Let’s combat worrywart tendencies once and for all! Most of the time, things are not as bad as you fear them to be.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

Tags: , , , ,