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Creating Successful Leaders

Photo by Mourizal Zativa on Unsplash

Practically speaking, we’re more connected than ever. With email, video chats, messaging apps, social media, and more, we’re just a click away from communicating with just about anyone. Why, then, is there so much talk about a nation-wide loneliness epidemic? Why are so many families out of touch with each other? Why are more and more people (from teens to the elderly) feeling isolated? And why do so many people not know their neighbors?

If technology built community, we would be a thriving network of individuals. Instead, many of us sit inside, scrolling through social media and “liking” others’ posts, without making any true connections. It seems we would rather have a million surface-level contacts than sit down with someone and have a conversation. This stark reality is unfortunate, because community is vital, and we need it more than ever.

How to Create Community

There is not, of course, a catch-all answer when it comes to building community. This is something that takes time and looks different in different circumstances. A person’s work community will look different from their community of family and friends, which will look different from their faith, volunteer, or special interest community. We may be more casual or more formal in certain communities. Or, we might feel like some topics are taboo in certain circles. Despite how different our communities can be, I do think some approaches to building community are universal. These include:

Be Genuine

We’ve probably all encountered people who strike us disingenuous or even “fake.” These types of people might be prone to exaggeration, or they might completely change their demeanor when they’re around certain people. While it’s fine to moderate your behavior around certain groups, there’s a big difference between editing your speech and becoming a completely different person. There’s also a difference between being a little more casual/formal in some situations and completely compromising your values. A genuine person will remain steadfast to their values and who they are, at their core.

Reach Out

Building community takes active work and participation. Extend invitations to others, be inclusive, and keep at. Sometimes it takes time for people to warm to you and feel as if they are part of your community. At the same time, if you sense that someone is truly not interested, there are other fish in the sea! Find those who seem interested in a reciprocal relationship—those who are willing to contribute and be a part of something.

Engage

In my book, The Ten-Minute Leadership Challenge, I devote an entire chapter to Building Community (focused on the workplace). Though this book was published a decade ago and parts of it are outdated (nothing about working remotely, for instance!), much of it is still relevant. In the community chapter, I discuss forming an authentic, respectful relationship with others by asking good questions and truly listening to the responses. The book puts forth a challenge related to this on page 119: “Test your listening skills. Challenge yourself to remember three important details from every conversation you have this week. Jot down those details immediately and then try to recall them two or three hours later. Can you do it?”

The purpose of this exercise is to 1) test your listening skills (are you truly paying attention?) and 2) help you learn something new about those around you. Healthy communities involve respectful and reciprocal relationships. It’s important to learn about each other, so we know how best to support and interact with one another.

If you’re feeling the isolation of our modern, social-media-dominated world, I suggest having the courage to put yourself out there, extend invitations to others, and start engaging in meaningful conversations. These are great first steps, but keep in mind: building community takes time and effort. If you genuinely care about your fellow community members, you will periodically check in with them and offer them support. And, if you surround yourself with caring and authentic individuals, they will do the same for you.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

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Photo by Linus Nylund on Unsplash

“I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples.”
– Mother Teresa

In these tumultuous times, when everything seems to be changing at lightning speed, it is easy to feel like a very small fish in a very big pond. Politics, technology, the economy—it all seems so chaotic and beyond our control. Additionally, when we turn on the news or log onto social media, we’re often blasted with the latest problems and scandals of the day, which can send us down a rabbit hole of bad news and hot takes.

With so much going on—so many changes and so much chaos—it is easy to become discouraged, overwhelmed, or even depressed. What can one person do against such large forces? How can one voice or one action possibly make a difference? Take heart! It’s possible your actions matter more than you think.

The Ripple Effect

When you throw a rock into a pond, it sends out ripples that change the surface of the water. This is a common metaphor that illustrates how one small action can make a world of difference. Every decision you’ve ever made has had some kind of effect, whether the decision was small (choosing to drive a certain route, deciding to say hi to a grocery clerk, etc.) or large (deciding if (and where) to go to college, choosing who to marry, etc.).

These choices can impact you, those around you, and even people you’ve never met. For example, if you choose to be kind to a grocery clerk, that person might brighten up a bit and say something nice to another customer, who, in turn, might leave a generous tip at dinner that evening, potentially helping out a server who needs a little extra money to care for her sick child. That chain of events might sound far-fetched, but things like this happen every day. Our actions ripple out in ways we will never fully know.

In other words, your decisions matter! Because of that, I encourage you to stop feeling small and start taking intentional actions, knowing that they can (and do) make a difference.

Focus on Small Actions

Although most of us are not equipped to singlehandedly influence large systems or the “powers that be,” we can make an impact through small, meaningful actions. Your actions might be directed toward any of the following:

  • Community (getting to know your neighbors better, helping someone with their yardwork)
  • Family (taking time to be present, scheduling a family trip)
  • Workplace (setting clear boundaries, asking for help when you need it, standing up for a co-worker)
  • Politics (attending a protest, making a phone call)
  • The Environment (picking up trash, planting a bee-friendly garden)
  • …the list goes on!

Your everyday actions matter. Even if you cannot see their full impact, just know that every decision you make (no matter how small) can potentially create a positive or negative influence. Because of that, it’s a good idea to move mindfully through the world, choosing to act with kindness, patience, and understanding. It does make a difference.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

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Photo by Andreea Avramescu on Unsplash

In my last post, I discussed the variety of ways in which people process and cope with change. While change might excite and energize some, others may feel discouraged or frightened by it. This, of course, can depend on what type of change we’re dealing with, and the circumstances around it. It also depends on a person’s personality and ways of processing change.

These concepts can all be tied to Insights® Discovery, a science-based program which helps people become better acquainted with themselves, their personal tendencies, how they react or adapt to certain situations, and more. (See my last post for more information on the program.) Suffice it to say, we all have different methods for dealing with change, and some of that is driven by our personal attributes and inclinations.

No one is flawless when it comes to fielding change. We all have areas of improvement, but we also have areas of strength. To help others cope with change, I’d like to challenge you to think about your personal strengths and how they can be an asset. Let’s discuss some of the strengths you might have:

You’re Research- or Data-Oriented

If you’re the type who likes to have the full, evidence-based picture before proceeding, you can play into this strength to help facilitate change. During times of uncertainty, research and data can assist us by painting a better picture of a situation (whether for better or worse!). And that, in turn, can help people understand how to move forward.

When leaning into this strength, keep in mind that not everyone sees the world as you do, so it’s a good idea to present the data in a way that is easily understood and digestible.

Note: these traits are associated with “blue energy” on the Insights® Discovery color wheel.

You’re a Go-Getter

For some, change is exciting and energizing. It feels like an opportunity to create a new, better reality. Even if a situation may seem negative on the surface, someone with a go-getter personality will want to move forward, experiment, and try out the new normal. While it is often a good idea for gregarious types to slow down, consider repercussions, and examine the data, it is also a good thing to have this type of movement-focused energy.

To help others, it’s prudent to channel some of this energy into concrete actions. Pinpoint a few reasons to get excited about the change and/or discuss a few ways of implementing the change as effortlessly as possible. Alternatively, if a certain change seems wholly terrible, a go-getter will develop strategies to refute or rework the change into something better. In short, let your enthusiasm be contagious and propel positive change.

Note: these traits are associated with “red energy” on the Insights® Discovery color wheel.

You’re Empathetic and Big-Hearted

Some people are defined by being caring and empathetic, often placing others’ wellbeing before their own. These compassionate souls can help either facilitate a change or soften its blow by considering how certain people (or groups of people) will react to or be affected by the change. Since the world (and workplace) is comprised of all types of people with different background and beliefs, it is tremendously valuable to be able to think beyond yourself and put yourself in others’ shoes.

This way of thinking can lead to adapting plans that work for a wide array of people, OR personalizing strategies to cater to certain groups. Perhaps certain aspects of a certain change will work for specific people, while other aspects should be rejected or reconsidered. Whatever the case, those with empathy are well-equipped to lead people-centered actions.

Note: these traits are associated with “green energy” on the Insights® Discovery color wheel.

You’re Creative

Some moments require creative minds and out-of-the-box thinkers to take the lead. These personality types can examine a difficult situation and start thinking of ways to rework it, move around it, or reject it. Creative solutions can help people dealing with a major change OR they can help to reinvent/rethink the change so it works better for more people.

If we pair creative types with those who prefer to lean on evidence and research, we can create a powerful team that, in theory, balances data with innovative solutions.

Note: these traits are associated with “yellow energy” on the Insights® Discovery color wheel.

No matter your personality, you have the capability to help others deal with change. Whether you’re opposed to or supportive of the change, you have the power to navigate it, using your unique strengths and personality traits. Start thinking about your personal attributes as your superpowers!

BONUS: Insights® Discovery provides a chart for the four major personality types (color energies) to manage change. I encourage you to take a look:

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE.

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