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“Creating Successful Leaders”

Category Archives: Advice from a Life Coach

March 16, 2022 4 Ways to Create Calm

3 rocks stacked in rings of sand

Almost everyone experiences periods of heightened anxiety or frustration. Those periods might last a few minutes, or they could endure much longer. If you’re dealing with a situation that is causing increased stress, it’s never a good idea to ignore your feelings and hope that everything will get better. Instead, focus on ways to reduce your personal stress AND remove or diminish the sources of stress.

NOTE: If you’re experiencing long-term or severe anxiety, it’s best to seek help from a licensed therapist or psychiatrist. Your mental health is important and can affect nearly every aspect of your life.

So, how do you deal with short-term stress or anxiety? Here are 4 methods to try.

1. Practice a breathing technique

Breathing with intention is a great way to create a sense of calm and ease tension. You could practice yoga-style breathing, where you inhale deeply while focusing on expanding your lungs and belly, and then release your breath and let your diaphragm contract. Or, you could practice something neuroscientist Andrew Huberman calls a “physiological sigh.” Essentially, you inhale through your nose and hold your breath for a few seconds. Then, inhale again before releasing it and hold for a few more seconds. After that, exhale through your mouth in one strong puff. Learn how this breathing technique helps you in Dr. Huberman’s short video.

2. Remove yourself from the situation

Sometimes, the easiest and most effective way to calm your nerves is to remove yourself from the anxiety-inducing situation. That might mean excusing yourself from a team meeting or Zoom call, or stepping away from your laptop for a few minutes. Giving yourself distance can help you to collect your thoughts, take a few deep breaths, and plan how you’ll proceed.

3. Identify sources of stress

Is there something in your life that is repeatedly causing you stress? Maybe you’re involved in too many committees or volunteer groups. Maybe you tend to agree to projects, even when your plate is full. Or, perhaps, your source of stress is a person—a boss or co-worker who tends to email you at odd hours, overload your agenda with work, or make poor decisions for the company or your work team.

Whatever the case, it’s useful to trace back your stress to the source(s). Once you have a clear idea of what’s causing most of the tension in your work life, you can take steps to change it.

4. Set healthy boundaries

One way to take charge of your stressors is to set healthy boundaries. Set parameters for when and how often you’ll answer emails, phone calls, or virtual chat requests. Say “no” to projects when you have too much on your plate or when projects are not a good fit (click the link for 10 effective ways to say no). If someone is causing you undue stress, have the courage to meet with that person and communicate your frustrations. Be tactful and make suggestions on how to improve the situation.

You can take charge of workplace stress. Take time to consider your stressors, create a plan, and act! And when life gets frustrating, don’t be afraid to dismiss yourself from the situation, breath, go for a walk, or even read a few pages in a book—whatever it takes to reduce your stress and calm your nerves. Work should not be a place of constant stress.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

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March 9, 2022 4 Ways to Find Meaning in Work

It’s no secret that the modern workforce is discontent. The Great Resignation has brought many issues to light including disengagement, long hours, and unfair expectations. People have also cited a lack of meaning/purpose as one of the factors that created job dissatisfaction. Especially for younger generations, it is important to find purpose in one’s work.

When you wake up in the morning, do you feel excited for work? Are you energized to begin your day?

If not, you may need to infuse a little more meaning into your work. You have more control over your personal path than you might think. Oftentimes, workplaces offer some degree of flexibility to carve out your own path and exercise purpose-driven actions.

No matter what industry you’re in, there’s usually an opportunity to integrate art, altruism, community, or whatever piques your interest into your work. It only takes a little creativity, initiative, and perseverance. Let’s explore some of the ways to do that.

NOTE: While it IS (usually) possible to take proactive steps to add purpose to your work, sometimes the job itself is fundamentally flawed or simply not right for you. In that case, consider talking to a career coach (drop me a note if you’d like).

1. Look For Existing Opportunities

Depending on your organization, meaningful opportunities may already exist. Some businesses have groups devoted to community projects, art, or forming bonds between like-minded co-workers. Affinity groups, like the ones offered at Wells Fargo corporate, are useful for making meaningful connections and inciting positive change. Do a little research and see if your workplace offers anything that aligns with your interests.

2. Integrate Interests With Daily Work

Interested in photography? Volunteer to take pictures for the monthly newsletter or company website. Love writing? Ask your boss for writing-heavy assignments or, if you’re working in a team, offer to take on the writing tasks. Want to contribute to environmental responsibility? Host team lunches that use reusable or compostable plates and cutlery.

In short, see if it’s possible to meld your interests with your everyday workload.

3. Take Initiative!

Create your own meaning by initiating groups devoted to volunteering, artistic endeavors, or other projects related to your interests. Of course, you’ll want to go through the proper channels to do this, but you might be surprised by how willing organizations can be when it comes to volunteer or enrichment programs. Chances are, other people will also be interested in your endeavor, which translates to a more tight-knit, content work community.

Some ideas you might consider:

  • Creating an artists’ club for knitting, painting, photography, or whatever you’re interested in (Instead of a weekly happy hour, host an “art session” instead!)
  • Start a “meaningful” book club that focuses on books with a strong purpose
  • Volunteering in the local community (soup kitchens, book drives, etc.)
  • Initiating fundraisers for schools, safety, health and wellness, or whatever you’d like
  • Starting a “green” group that occasionally gets together to do roadside cleanups or raise money for parks, clean water, etc.
  • Founding a wellness program that focuses on clean eating, meditation, weekly yoga, or whatever you’re passionate about

4. Look For Resources

Some organizations have funds set aside for “extracurricular” work activities. Do your research! Your company might be willing to sponsor your initiative. Don’t forget, people count as resources too. You may be surprised by others’ excitement and willingness to help.

Do you feel invigorated? Energized? Ready to dive in and figure out how to make work more meaningful for YOU? I hope so. Finding meaning in your work is vital for your sustained happiness.

If you’d like a little more guidance, I’m here to help.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

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March 2, 2022 Small Actions Make a Big Difference

In this big, complicated world, it’s easy to feel small and insignificant. Right now, we’re in the midst of global turmoil, political divisions, and environmental uncertainty. Everything seems tense, complex and, frankly, overwhelming. And we don’t necessarily need a war or a pandemic to feel this way. It’s certainly possible to feel overwhelmed and anxious in the face of a large, complicated work project or a major life change.

What can you do when you’re feeling small and helpless?

I encourage you to focus on mini action-steps and tiny progressions. Small steps can and DO make a big difference. Fundraisers often rely on grassroots donations of $15 or $25. Pollution can be cut significantly by reducing single-use plastics or switching to more sustainable modes of transportation. A few kind words or a helping hand can make an enormous difference to someone who’s struggling.

Thinking about this from a work angle, small action steps are essential to completing large projects. A 50-page report is written one word at a time. A sales goal is achieved one buyer at a time. When you’re staring down a big project, try reframing it.

Here are a few steps to try:

  • Break the project down into smaller components
  • Create a project calendar with deadlines for the smaller pieces
  • If you’re working with others, figure out the best way to divide the work and monitor your collective progress
  • Identify small tasks you can do NOW
  • If possible, delegate or automate parts of the process

We’ve established that small action steps can eventually lead to the completion of large, daunting projects, but that’s not all they can do. Small actions can also provide some much-needed motivation. If, for instance, you’re feeling disheartened by your ever-growing to-do list, try finding the easiest item on the list and doing it NOW.

It’s best if the item only takes a few minutes to complete—answering an email you’ve been putting off, cleaning out a certain file folder, tidying your office for an afternoon Zoom meeting. The act of accomplishing something (no matter how small!) will give you a jolt of motivation and will probably inspire you to keep going. You’ll get to cross something off your to-do list and have a small sense of accomplishment.

Though it’s easy to feel helpless and small at times, know that your actions do make a difference. Every significant thing on earth—from ocean beaches to the first airplane—is the result of smaller components and/or action steps.

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

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