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Creating Successful Leaders

Category Archives: Advice from a Life Coach

Most of us can identify with the term “procrastinator.” When a deadline looms on the horizon, when unpaid bills begin to pile up on the desk, when the task at the top of the priority list nibbles at the back of our brains, a very common inclination is to just put it off. “Tomorrow, I’ll get going on the house project,” we tell ourselves. “Next week I’ll tackle that research for the upcoming presentation.” From experience, we know that procrastination leads to feelings of anxiety, guilt and low self-esteem. So why do we keep putting ourselves through this?

John Perry, Professor of philosophy at Stanford University, tackles the problem of procrastination in his book, The Art of Procrastination. His big idea is that we should turn procrastination into a positive habit with what he calls structured procrastination.

All procrastinators put off things they have to do. Structured procrastination is the art of making this negative trait work for you.  (2012)

Perry continues, stating that procrastinating “does not mean doing absolutely nothing. Procrastinators seldom do absolutely nothing; they do marginally useful things, such as gardening or sharpening pencils or making a diagram of how they will reorganize their files when they get around to it.” Becoming aware of this minimizes the voice in our head that tells us we are lazy or unproductive. Instead of feeling depressed over procrastinating on one task, we can point to a whole heap of accomplished tasks that demonstrate how useful and effective we really are. These may not be the things we were “supposed” to have been doing, but any accomplished goal warrants feeling good about.

Yet how should the procrastinator deal with the big, scary, looming task itself? Perry suspects that procrastination may in fact be the result of perfectionism: “Many procrastinators do not realize that they are perfectionists, for the simple reason that we have never done anything perfectly or even nearly so.” Perfectionism “is a matter of fantasy, not reality.”

Often the procrastinator feels paralyzed by the unrealistically high standards they set for themselves. The project feels too big; it seems unclear where to even begin.  And as the days toward the deadline fly by, the procrastinator busies themselves with other tasks as a way to justify not working on what they are supposed to be working on.

To combat this, we should do a bit of a reality check: “You have to get into the habit of forcing yourself to analyze, at the time you accept a task, the costs and benefits of doing a less-than-perfect job.” In other words, we need to implement a realistic perspective of our abilities and time constraints. To do this, we must first realize that the fantasy of perfection is just that: a fantasy. More often than not, “a less-than-perfect job will do just fine,” says Perry. This is not to advocate mediocre work. Instead, this outlook points out the simple fact that nobody on the face of the planet has ever done anything perfectly. With this in mind, it becomes easier for the procrastinator (who very well may also be the perfectionist) to free themselves from unrealistic fantasies, and sit down and get to work.

All in all, procrastination can be a negative force in your life if you make it one. Or, it can be a helpful tool. If you’re feeling rotten about having put off something important, make a list of all the things you’ve accomplished during this time. You may surprise yourself with how big the list can get. Allow yourself to feel good about these accomplishments! Were you doing all those things to avoid something else? Perhaps, but that doesn’t take away from the good work you’ve done in other areas of your life. Now you have positive momentum, so use it to start the thing you’ve been avoiding. Free yourself from the fantasy of perfection, and be confident that by stressing over the work, you’re demonstrating that you care about the outcome. Good work will follow.

Perry, John. Date. The Art of Procrastination. New York: Workman Publishing Company, Inc.

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I read an article titled “10 Tips for Feeling Less Trapped at Work” in the Pioneer Press that aligns perfectly with many of the things I speak about and share with clients. The article’s author, Amy Lindgren, made the great observation that, due to the sluggish—if not non-existent at times—job market, “people feel trapped by the position or company they are currently employed by.”

I agree with the Lindgren’s claim that people feel trapped due to their limited employment options. But I’d like to take Lindgren’s idea one step further: Not is the job market slow, but employers are also struggling to figure out how to keep people engaged and excited about their positions at a time they can’t expand, offer the opportunities they previously offered, or challenge people in the ways they had hoped. In the work I do with companies and their employees, we seek to keep people energized and working on self-improvement so that they’re ready for the opportunities when they arise.

Lindgren supports her claim by urging readers to “make the best of the situation while you are waiting for the tide to turn.”

Her 10 Tips Include:

1. Go Deeper or Get More Shallow: If you are just barely there mentally, getting more deeply involved might engage more of your skills and increase your sense of satisfaction.

2. Seek Balance and Variety: While jobs that are the same every day can be comforting, they can also be numbing. Can you switch some duties with a co-worker to provide more balance in your day?

3. Take Your Breaks: Always take your lunch breaks, a short walk in the morning or afternoon, or any other opportunity to clear your mind, change our perspective, get re-energized, and increase your heart rate. Stepping away from your desk gets blood flowing to your brain and keeps your energy up. Americans are known for sitting long hours, skipping breaks and eating lunch at their desks.

4. Shake Up Your Routine: Instead of eating a sandwich at your desk, eat it while taking a walk outdoors. Maybe you can start a lunch club with co-workers or a Friday potluck.

5. Build Work Relationships: We’re all in this together, after all. Why not do something as a group once a month?

6. Go Home on Time at Least 3 Days a Week: If you can’t get all your work done, there’s either too much work on your plate or you’re using time inefficiently. Whether it’s too much work, or not working the right way, solve the problem.

7. Do Something Outside of Work: Look for something to do that is just for you, such as a good work out—perhaps yoga?

8. Solve a Different Problem: If your work issues seem intractable, turn your attention to other problems that need resolution in your life. How long are you willing to put those things on hold while you wait for work to improve?

9. Start Your Career Exploration Process: If you’ve been itching to move on, this can be within your company or outside of it. It’s never too early to start the networking, planning, and exposure necessary to make a new calling a reality. If you wait, you may be slowing down your progress when the time is right.

10. Prepare Your Resume: Having your resume ready will increase your sense of empowerment and help make all of your accomplishments more obvious to you. This is surely a way to feel less trapped.

Read all of the details of Amy’s comments at:  PioneerPress.com

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By Margaret Smith, UXL: Creating Successful Leaders
SPEAKER | CAREER COACH | CERTIFIED INSIGHTS DISCOVERY PRACTITIONER

For me the ocean is a magical place where I can relax and get lost in the consistency and the power of the waves. It’s also a place where I witness amazing imagination in other people and a calm that doesn’t exist in their everyday world.

I recently spent two weeks on the beach in Delaware where my family has a house. It’s become a tradition for family and friends to gather there for the last two weeks of July. I’m never quite sure whose car will pull in the driveway or where they will sleep, but that’s the fun of being ‘at the beach’. It always works out and there always seems to be plenty of food and floor space!

It may come as a surprise, but the beach turned out to be offer a lot more than sun, water, and sand. I actually observed a lot of amazing leadership truths while I relaxed and watched.

What the Beach Teaches You About Leadership:

1. Be Open: As they say, “if you build it, they will come.” Start building a tradition today—the memories are priceless. You may also find you have more friends than you realized and the laughter outpaces the ice making. My family came from Colorado, Georgia, Virginia, and Pennsylvania (we came from Minnesota, but that doesn’t count!). High school and college friends showed up, even just for a day. It was a treat to look west and see someone who we hadn’t seen in a year crossing the dunes laden with an umbrella, chairs, and sunscreen!

2. Get Outdoors: The ocean is entertainment for all ages.  A pile of sand and the mystery of the next wave brings out the child in everyone. Young children, parents who probably are difficult to pull away from their blackberry, and grandparents all mix it up on the beach. It was the real great American get together.

3. Take Risks: One morning I was taking a walk at the water’s edge and observed a mother with her three children. I would guess her kids were around 5 to 8 years old, and they were all preparing to take on the waves. Their mother was giving them instructions on how to jump and dive to avoid getting blasted and thrown up on the shore like the sea shells they had been picking up. As she dove into water that was roaring and foaming and changing depths she yelled, “Come on go for it!” The look on their faces read, “Are you kidding?! I can’t see the bottom, I don’t know what is out there… It goes on forever! Is she nuts?” Despite their fears, they soon go the hang of it.

Later, I saw the children’s mother yelling at them ‘ot to walk back to their beach house alone. The oddness of her concern about walking to the house vs. jumping into this massive, ferocious looking body of water that they knew nothing about struck me. The ocean has the power to make taking risks a good thing.

4. Challenge Yourself: I love watching the Olympics, and I could see the same energy and challenge of the Olympics demonstrated all along the beach. Volleyball became popular, with nets going up every 100 yards, girls doing cartwheels, races being held, new games being created, and all in the spirit of healthy competition and the creativity. We sure are capable of new ideas when we’re not glued to a screen. In here lies a strong message for all of us: Move a little and accept a new challenge.

5. Pitch In: You carry so much stuff to the beach for the day and everyone needs to pitch in. And, just as soon as we get it out there, we have to help carry it back to the house (and it never fits as well when it’s full of sand!). Even the smallest in the family helped and felt like an important part of the team. Many times we observed people reaching out  to help someone laden with beach supplies and sandy kids make it over the dunes. We’re all in ‘this’ together—it’s a lot more fun with some help.

Thanks for listening. I can’t wait until next year!

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