Category Archives: Advice from a Life Coach
August 21, 2012 What the Beach Teaches You About Leadership
By Margaret Smith, UXL: Creating Successful Leaders
SPEAKER | CAREER COACH | CERTIFIED INSIGHTS DISCOVERY PRACTITIONER
For me the ocean is a magical place where I can relax and get lost in the consistency and the power of the waves. It’s also a place where I witness amazing imagination in other people and a calm that doesn’t exist in their everyday world.
I recently spent two weeks on the beach in Delaware where my family has a house. It’s become a tradition for family and friends to gather there for the last two weeks of July. I’m never quite sure whose car will pull in the driveway or where they will sleep, but that’s the fun of being ‘at the beach’. It always works out and there always seems to be plenty of food and floor space!
It may come as a surprise, but the beach turned out to be offer a lot more than sun, water, and sand. I actually observed a lot of amazing leadership truths while I relaxed and watched.
What the Beach Teaches You About Leadership:
1. Be Open: As they say, “if you build it, they will come.” Start building a tradition today—the memories are priceless. You may also find you have more friends than you realized and the laughter outpaces the ice making. My family came from Colorado, Georgia, Virginia, and Pennsylvania (we came from Minnesota, but that doesn’t count!). High school and college friends showed up, even just for a day. It was a treat to look west and see someone who we hadn’t seen in a year crossing the dunes laden with an umbrella, chairs, and sunscreen!
2. Get Outdoors: The ocean is entertainment for all ages. A pile of sand and the mystery of the next wave brings out the child in everyone. Young children, parents who probably are difficult to pull away from their blackberry, and grandparents all mix it up on the beach. It was the real great American get together.
3. Take Risks: One morning I was taking a walk at the water’s edge and observed a mother with her three children. I would guess her kids were around 5 to 8 years old, and they were all preparing to take on the waves. Their mother was giving them instructions on how to jump and dive to avoid getting blasted and thrown up on the shore like the sea shells they had been picking up. As she dove into water that was roaring and foaming and changing depths she yelled, “Come on go for it!” The look on their faces read, “Are you kidding?! I can’t see the bottom, I don’t know what is out there… It goes on forever! Is she nuts?” Despite their fears, they soon go the hang of it.
Later, I saw the children’s mother yelling at them ‘ot to walk back to their beach house alone. The oddness of her concern about walking to the house vs. jumping into this massive, ferocious looking body of water that they knew nothing about struck me. The ocean has the power to make taking risks a good thing.
4. Challenge Yourself: I love watching the Olympics, and I could see the same energy and challenge of the Olympics demonstrated all along the beach. Volleyball became popular, with nets going up every 100 yards, girls doing cartwheels, races being held, new games being created, and all in the spirit of healthy competition and the creativity. We sure are capable of new ideas when we’re not glued to a screen. In here lies a strong message for all of us: Move a little and accept a new challenge.
5. Pitch In: You carry so much stuff to the beach for the day and everyone needs to pitch in. And, just as soon as we get it out there, we have to help carry it back to the house (and it never fits as well when it’s full of sand!). Even the smallest in the family helped and felt like an important part of the team. Many times we observed people reaching out to help someone laden with beach supplies and sandy kids make it over the dunes. We’re all in ‘this’ together—it’s a lot more fun with some help.
Thanks for listening. I can’t wait until next year!
Tags: Beach, Improving Leadership, Leadership
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- Posted under Advice from a Life Coach, Changing Your Life, Leadership
August 9, 2012 The Most Important Leadership Quality
A recent article published in the Harvard Business Review claims that one quality rises above the rest when it comes to great leadership: self-awareness. In the article, titled “How Leaders Become Self-Aware”, author Anthony Tjan poses a question to help us understand what is meant by self-awareness: “What motivates you and your decision making?”
Are you prepared to respond? Unless you have already made practice in self awareness part of your everyday and you’ve taken the assessments and consulted with others, you may struggle to answer Tjan’s question.
Tjan outlines three steps that all of us can take to become better leader in our life. Because I do a lot of work with self-awareness as an Insights Practitioner, I’m always combing through new resources for my coaching when it comes to self-awareness. I thought Tjan’s pointers were spot on and provided some great ideas for improving effectiveness and interactions.
Test and Know Yourself Better
This translates simply to take a personality test. I know it sounds simple (and the process can be as simple as answering questions about yourself for half an hour online, in the case of Insights Discovery), but this quick gesture, when given reflection, can transform the way you work and your relationships with others. Tjan advocates self-assessments because “they facilitate self-reflection, which leads to better self-awareness.”
Watch Yourself and Learn
This step plays out on a more long term scale, but can have big takeaways when done correctly. The process of this step is simple: when making a big decision, always record your reasons for that decision and then revisit these reasons 9-12 months later. What panned out and what didn’t? Tjan labels this practice as feedback analysis and explains that its effectiveness is found in two steps: “a) codify rationale and motivators and b) reflect and assess outcomes.”
Be Aware of Others, Too
Self-awareness is no good if you live alone on an island—the real power of this knowledge reveals itself when you interact with others on a team. “Knowing your natural strengths and weaknesses makes you a better recruiter and allocator of talent,” says Tjan. But this knowledge is most effective when you’re aware of the strengths of those around you, because this results in a group of people who both “understand and complement each other.” A strong team is founded on the diverse approaches and skills of its members, and because these members approach tasks differently, this promotes learning and feedback within the group—it leads to innovation.
Have questions about self-awareness? Feel free to contact me for answers.
Tags: Career Coach Advice, Delegation, How to Change Your Life, Improving Relationships, Insights Discovery
July 25, 2012 No Sweat, No Fail Networking
By Margaret Smith, UXL: Creating Successful Leaders
SPEAKER | CAREER COACH | CERTIFIED INSIGHTS DISCOVERY PRACTITIONER
Networking… Just the shear mention of the word makes my knees buckle and my deodorant is challenged.
Networking is, however, one of the most important skills to perfect, no matter where you are on your career journey. Did you know that more than 80% of jobs today are found through contacts, not over the internet or by blindly sending a resume.
You’ve probably familiar with the phrase “It’s who you know, not what you know”, and for a period of time, a lot of us could afford to ignore this little axiom. Well, the times certainly have changed. Now, more and more people are discovering the truth behind this common message.
Today, your contacts (and your contact’s contacts) are the real door openers to the interview.
Networking is essential to the job hunt, but it’s not limited to those looking for employment. Even if you currently have a job, a new position may be searching for you. If you don’t have the right connections internally your name may not come up—opportunity missed!
No Sweat, No Fail Networking
The first step is to figure out where to go. Where can you find the people that you need to meet—where do they hang out? Find the events and activities that attract the people and organizations you need or want to meet.
The 3 Parts of Successful Networking:
1) Know your Audience: Who will be there? Who do I need/want to meet? How do I “show up”?
2) Have an Objective: Is my objective to collect 15 business cards or to meet the 3 most influential people at the event? You will achieve what you set your mind to do.
3) Be Prepared and Practice: Know how you will introduce yourself, what you do or what you want. Make sure you have a request ready, such as “May I call you next week to set up some time to learn more?” or “Whom in your organization is involved in what I am interested in?” or “Who do you suggest I meet here tonight?”
Practice is the fun part. Stand in front of the mirror, watch your body language, smile, and figure out ways to share your energy so people enjoy their encounter with you.
Don’t forget to follow up via phone or email with the people you meet and remind them of something from your conversation.
Okay, now my knees stopped shaking and I am writing down my introduction so I can practice for that event on Monday night…Good luck!
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