UXL Blog

I am a big proponent of heart-led leadership. So many leadership courses, books, and webinars teach us that leaders have to be firm, competent, excellent communicators, and assertive. While those traits can be helpful in leadership, I would put a different trait above them: compassion.

When people think about compassion and kindness in leadership, they may think that means the leader is soft or a “pushover.” In my experience, however, kindness does not automatically mean weakness. It is very possible to be both kind and assertive. It is possible to genuinely care about your people and create firm boundaries and expectations.

Instead of a weakness, I see kindness as a superpower. When you take the time to truly get to know your people, listen to them, and offer genuine compassion and respect, you foster a positive work environment where people want to show up and do good work. When people feel that they are part of a caring team, they will want to put their best foot forward, meet deadlines, and perform at their peak. They’re motivated to do better, because they know the company’s leadership has a vested interest in them and their success.

To establish yourself as a kind, caring leader, you can begin by taking a few action steps that convey your heart-led leadership style. Here are 6 suggestions:

Schedule One-on-Ones

Even busy leaders can find fifteen or twenty minutes to meet one-on-one with a team member. Taking the time to check in with someone individually will not only convey that you care, but will also provide some valuable time for you to get to know the person across the table on a personal level. This can be difficult to achieve in group settings, especially if the person is not terribly open or outspoken.

Get to Know Your People

When engaging in one-on-ones, it’s a good idea to ask a few “get to know you” questions. Start learning about your team members’ backgrounds, families, pets, and interests, and be sure to touch on these things in subsequent meetings (“How is your mom? Is she feeling any better since her accident?”). If you need help remembering details about others, try creating a spreadsheet dedicated to tracking information about each team member—the name of their kids, the type of dog they have, etc. Few people have a perfect memory, and there’s no shame in using a tool to help yourself out.

Open Up

When you’re getting to know others, it is important to reciprocate. Any relationship, including work relationships, are healthiest when they are a two-way street. Offer information about yourself when it seems relevant and appropriate. For example, if your team member is talking about an upcoming vacation, you might tell them a little about your experience visiting that area, or you could talk about your own upcoming trip.

Ask Good Questions (and Listen!)

Asking good questions is an art. When sitting down with someone, it’s important to not just talk at them or ask yes/no questions. Instead, ask open-ended questions that prompt a dialogue. These types of questions can help you get to know the other person and will help you gauge the temperature of the workplace (Are tempers hot? Has enthusiasm for a project or client cooled?).

But asking questions isn’t enough. It is also critical to listen to the answers and attempt to understand the other person’s perspective. If you’re unsure about what someone is saying, or you need more details, be sure to ask follow-up questions. Alternatively, you could repeat back what you think you heard by saying, “It sounds like you’re saying XYZ, is that correct?”

Show Genuine Appreciation

Pay attention to your people and show them appreciation whenever they go above and beyond. Call out outstanding performance, recognize achievements, or write out a thank you card. These small acts can make an enormous difference.

Take Action to Improve the Workplace

When sitting down with your people, you might discover that they are unhappy with certain aspects of the workplace. If that’s the case, it is imperative to take steps to create change. You don’t want to be the type of person who is all talk and no action. Rather, if you are genuinely committed to being a positive presence, that means taking meaningful action to improve the workplace and the lives of the people who work for you.

Kindness and compassion are not incompatible with strong leadership. Rather, it can help improve morality, foster a better work environment, and create an energized atmosphere in the office. How might the modern workplace transform if all leaders chose to be kind?

MARGARET SMITH IS A CAREER COACH, AUTHOR, INSIGHTS® DISCOVERY (AND DEEPER DISCOVERY) LICENSED PRACTITIONER, AND FOUNDER OF UXL. SHE HOSTS WORKSHOPS FOR PEOPLE WHO NEED CAREER OR PERSONAL GUIDANCE. 
CHECK OUT MARGARET’S ONLINE LEADERSHIP COURSE. 

Tags: compassionate leadership, heart-led leadership, kind leadership, leadership best practices, leadership tips, margaret smith leadership, Margaret Smith UXL